Monday, October 31, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
A retrospect
Halloween celebrations tomorrow.
So I had a look back at my past costumes.
Memories, like the corners of my mind, misty water coloured memories. Of the way we were....
So I had a look back at my past costumes.
Memories, like the corners of my mind, misty water coloured memories. Of the way we were....
Thursday, October 27, 2011
LAUGH
I can not take credit for this, I saw it on Facebook so I have no idea who the original author of these responses is.
I found it incredibly amusing. On my travels I have been asked many questions about Australia from foreigners.
'Do you have ipods in Australia?'
'Do you have Mcdonalds in Australia?'
'If you are from Australia. why are you so white? Aren't Australians supposed to be tanned?'
These were posted on an Australian tourism website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!).
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________ ________________________
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )
A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? ( UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-me-ri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Do you have perfume in Australia? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.
__________________________ ________________________
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.
__________________________ ________________________
I found it incredibly amusing. On my travels I have been asked many questions about Australia from foreigners.
'Do you have ipods in Australia?'
'Do you have Mcdonalds in Australia?'
'If you are from Australia. why are you so white? Aren't Australians supposed to be tanned?'
__________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
__________________________
Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________
Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )
A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
__________________________
Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
__________________________
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
__________________________
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________
Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? ( UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________
Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.
__________________________
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-me-ri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
__________________________
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
__________________________
Q: Do you have perfume in Australia? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.
__________________________
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________
Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
__________________________
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________
Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.
__________________________
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.
__________________________
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
I AM THE MAIN CHARACTER OF MY LIFE
I recently watched Daydream Nation while on holidays with my girlfriends.
We liked it, but found it so confusing and strange.
It is odd though today I am a grumpy, and a lot of things from this movie exactly represent how I feel and how I think I am the main character of my own life.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
HMMM
One hungover morning we were perusing through our facebooks and wondering what people think of us by looking at our profile pictures.
I wonder.
I wonder.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Fingers crossed
I just found my new favourite show.
Happy Endings.
I enjoy a lot.
I think it is on par with How I Met Your Mother. Blasphemy?
Penny is awesome.
Hope it does not get cancelled.
Happy Endings.
I enjoy a lot.
I think it is on par with How I Met Your Mother. Blasphemy?
Penny is awesome.
Hope it does not get cancelled.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Gosh
I am a little insane, I can admit that.
So to distract my mind from the myriad of manic thoughts which consume it on a daily basis I like to obsess over plans, mainly travel plans.
When I was in high school, I decided I wanted to go to America and be a nanny or work in a summer camp. When I was 21I had one of the best summers of my life working in a camp in Philadelphia.
About a year and a half ago, I decided I wanted to volunteer in Africa. Now in 2 months time, I will be on route to Kenya.
Whenever life gets me down and I get grumpy at my situation I cannot help but think of the amazing things I have done and are going to do. I am pretty lucky.
So anyway, as my trip to Africa is payed for and one its way to eventuating there is no need to plan that anymore. So I needed a new trip to obsess over. Now I will hopefully be able to maybe fit a Euro adventure in before this, but I really want to do a US road trip in 2013.
Who knows who I will go with, or when exactly I will go- all I know is these are the places that I must see!
Graceland- Memphis, Tennessee
Badlands- South Dakota
MT. Rushmore- South Dakota
New Orleans
A dude ranch in Wyoming or somewhere similar
Stay in a Wigwam in Arizona
Explore upstate New York getting at least one photo with a 'Woodstock' sign
Spend time exploring the real NYC, with less emphasis on shopping this time
Go back to Philly.
Get another tattoo in Atlantic City
Drive through the mid west
Party in Vegas again
San Francisco
Explore LA again, staying on Venice Beach or Santa Monica
Hike to the Hollywood sign
Go to Hawaii
Explore Mexico and go to Cancun again.
Better start saving, and better start making the road trip playlist.
x
So to distract my mind from the myriad of manic thoughts which consume it on a daily basis I like to obsess over plans, mainly travel plans.
When I was in high school, I decided I wanted to go to America and be a nanny or work in a summer camp. When I was 21I had one of the best summers of my life working in a camp in Philadelphia.
About a year and a half ago, I decided I wanted to volunteer in Africa. Now in 2 months time, I will be on route to Kenya.
Whenever life gets me down and I get grumpy at my situation I cannot help but think of the amazing things I have done and are going to do. I am pretty lucky.
So anyway, as my trip to Africa is payed for and one its way to eventuating there is no need to plan that anymore. So I needed a new trip to obsess over. Now I will hopefully be able to maybe fit a Euro adventure in before this, but I really want to do a US road trip in 2013.
Who knows who I will go with, or when exactly I will go- all I know is these are the places that I must see!
Graceland- Memphis, Tennessee
Badlands- South Dakota
MT. Rushmore- South Dakota
New Orleans
A dude ranch in Wyoming or somewhere similar
Stay in a Wigwam in Arizona
Explore upstate New York getting at least one photo with a 'Woodstock' sign
Spend time exploring the real NYC, with less emphasis on shopping this time
Go back to Philly.
Get another tattoo in Atlantic City
Drive through the mid west
Party in Vegas again
San Francisco
Explore LA again, staying on Venice Beach or Santa Monica
Hike to the Hollywood sign
Go to Hawaii
Explore Mexico and go to Cancun again.
Better start saving, and better start making the road trip playlist.
x
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Babe
I have been watching the new sitcom 'New Girl' with the glorious Zooey Deschanel.
Is there anyone more exquisite than her?
I don't think so.
Is there anyone more exquisite than her?
I don't think so.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Love Me do.
I am attempting to learn how to play some of The Beatles songs on a harmonica for a Creative Arts assignment I have due next week. It is difficult, mostly because I am probably musically illiterate. Don't get me wrong, when looking at multiple intelligences my highest intelligence and best way of learning is musically. But that can only be attributed to my constant need for music to be playing. Playing an instrument, not my forte.
So after practicing the opening to 'Love me do' for an hour or two, I go and play a few bars for my mother. She had no idea what song so I sang it to her. She informed me she never liked The Beatles so didn't care.
Who doesn't like The Beatles! They could be the least offensive band of all time. How can someone not like them. I guess my love of them was passed down from my papa.
Now I know why she wouldn't let me name our birds 'John' and 'Yoko'.
So after practicing the opening to 'Love me do' for an hour or two, I go and play a few bars for my mother. She had no idea what song so I sang it to her. She informed me she never liked The Beatles so didn't care.
Who doesn't like The Beatles! They could be the least offensive band of all time. How can someone not like them. I guess my love of them was passed down from my papa.
Now I know why she wouldn't let me name our birds 'John' and 'Yoko'.
Via weheartit
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
This is Halloween
So it is already October, so that means time to plan ones Halloween outfit. It is not a big celebration in Australia, compared to what it is in the U.S, but we never need an excuse to dress up! Over the years I have dressed up as Medusa, a goon bag, a nurse, a bloody murdered nurse, a lion, Snow White and a crab.
Usually we tend to go for the slutty option, slutty police officer, slutty cow girl, slutty anything. Or even the zombie option, this is where we just add fake blood to any outfit to make it scary, yet sexy.
This was my girlfriends and I last year!
This year I want to go for something a bit darker. This is my short list.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)